I’ve come to realise with cities, you never get a sense of how large they are unless you’re living at its fringes.
Salzburg gave us an illusion of sort on just how large it was because we were staying right at the eye of it, just a five minute walk from the Salzach river that runs through old and new Salzburg and just a very brisk 10-minute walk from Residenzplatz which you could argue is mostly where the action happens, if there is any action happening at all. So in Salzburg, it always felt like the high-interest areas were just a very walkable stroll away. This was not the case in Vienna.
There was a specific moment in Vienna, when it felt like I was trying to gorge in the streets but it was never ending and I was starting to get indigestion from trying. I had just gone on a quick two-hour sojourn to two record stores on my own. The first was memorable because it was the record store that appeared in one of my favorite movies of all-time, ‘Before Sunrise’. ALT & NEU or in its Austrian name ‘Teuchtler Schallplattenhandlung Antiquariat’ is the kind of record store that would appear to old-school vinyl romantics. Located in a basement-like structure with mosaic-tile floors, stained walls, it was not one of those clean minimalist record stores that look good in photoshoots. This was a dingy, grimy space that’s just filled wall-to-wall with records. There were records stashed underneath chairs, tables, behind doors. At one point I considered looking under the owner’s shoes to see if I had missed anything. You know a record store is worth the ground it is built on and its story worth the pages it is written on when each section of the record store gives you a feeling that toggles painfully between wanting to excitedly start digging and giving up altogether cause the task looks insurmountable. Minimalism is not a great look on a record store. Teuchtler was the kind of store that required a couple of days to dig through and I had about 45 minutes. I got there around 5-15pm and it was closing at 6. The kind lady behind the counter gave me an hour and a half to dig pass their usual closing hours. She even helped me get a few pictures, including one of me with Jesse and Celine in the background. Melt. She also gave me a record for free (I later found out she does this for practically everybody). It’s not a great listen but a free record is not the worst free thing you can get. Potpourri is.
There was a point when I was walking from Teuchtler to my second stop Moses Records where I found myself walking rather quickly (to catch that store before it closes at 8) but the roads just seemed endless. Night was sweeping in, the air was getting more biting every minute, I was slightly underdressed for it, but yet I was sweating because I was moving at a frantic pace. Walking is always the best way to experience a city. Zipping through its large and small streets. It’s much better if you’re just walking serendipitously all over a city without much agenda but in this case I had a place to get to and I should try and get back not too late less my wife sends the polizei out to get me. Incidentally, we were staying just a door away from a polizeistation.
But even in that somewhat manic rush, with long streets to conquer and a limited timeline to do it, I found myself stopping on occasions to admire little streets, small restaurants with diners enjoying a wine outside as desk set in, low-rise apartments with intricate and tasteful architecture, etc. This is the heartbeat of a city to me. This sojourn reminded me a lot of my solo walk back in Salzburg, not just because I was alone walking the streets here as well, but also because it allowed me to take in a city in a way that made sense to me. No specific sight to see, just rows of Viennese streets with life booming unassumingly around it. I love watching people going about their daily lives in a place that’s alien to me. The little touches here and there always get me. The kind of bags they are carrying after a workday – groceries, exercise or professional, gives a glimpse of their life’s routines. The kind of clothes they wear, intricately put together to ward off the weather with boots, scarfs, jackets and gloves all working together to achieve a level of comfort for the wearer. It makes me think about how different that is for us back home, where a pair of shorts and t-shirt will serve you well all year round except when you have dress codes imposed on you (anyone that requires someone to dress formally at an open air event in this part of the world should be subjected to a firing squad and laughter after). It just feels romantically exotic to me, the idea that you have to plan your wear according to the season because at no point in my life (with the exception of vacations) did I have to consider these things on a day-to-day context. I was taking it all in during the walk and it felt, enlightening.
Vienna is a pristine city. If it was a person, it would be someone that always has his shirt tucked neatly, clean socks on at all times and not a strand of hair that’s out of place. Sure, the areas where horse carriages park can smell like the ball sack of a buffalo but for the most part the city looks like one that intends to show just show its good side. The intricate gothic-style architecture was quite gob-smacking initially but after a while, it all became rather tepid quickly. I have never been particularly intrigued with clean and sterilized cities. It’s all pleasant to walk through but where’s the soul and character? That saying Vienna has hardly committed any crime punishable by death in this regard (as opposed to say our neighbors south of us) because while I found it rather lukewarm, there is still enough to love about the city.
That saying our first hours meeting with Vienna unfolded like a B-grade movie, with the tale taking swift, jagged and unnatural turns. One hour we were stuffing ourselves through a lovely brunch and in the next couple of ones after, saw me and the wife stuck in a dramatic predicament that involved running from a mysterious man in shades, being rescued by a team of radioactive rabbits and learning that 1+1 does not equal 2 but 3. Okay not quite as dramatic but it did involve mistaken parking lots, potentially misplaced cars and horrible business process and instructions in the course of us trying to return our rental. Hardly want to go into detail about our ordeal but to the Hertz office in Vienna, we ask that you consider these things to improve your return process:
- Partner with a nearby parking garage to store your cars
- Ensure that the instructions on your window corresponds with the documents you give to customers (ie, hire a bloody copywriter, namely me)
- Give up on the business altogether
Oh, wait, can’t believe I breezed pass the brunch we had. We were sat under grape trees in a courtyard, on a sunny and chilly afternoon, stuffing our face with a brunch buffet spread that can only be described as more awesome than Charles Bronson’s moustache. It was the kind of spread that would drive a vegan to hang themselves in despair. From carved ham, to beef stews and roasted bone marrows, it was a fare to rival the ages. And naturally, without compulsion and not thinking about the vegans of the world, I dove in and tore through the spread with lion-like ferocity and cheetah-like speed. I was basically the closest I have ever been to being a champion of any sort. 24-mins later, I was done. It’s curious how quickly Asians blaze through their food compared to my Austrian counterparts. That, and that for them, even if it is a buffet and you can go back for food as many rounds as you would like, they mostly just take the requisite courses of starter (salads), a main (one or two meats) and dessert (in this case cakes). Unlike us who behaved like we were basically auditioning for an Olympic-level eating competition. I was basically eating for four and I was not even pregnant with one. Ah, cultures, don’t you love them?
Vienna is a city that requires you to slowly wine and dine, for it to reciprocate affection. It’s not a frantic city that assaults your senses and attempts to capture your imagination at every turn. It instead sits politely at its corner, legs crossed, smiling shyly whenever your eyes meet. It clearly is beautiful, but it would never at any point attempt to convince you of its beauty. It’s something for you to discover. The architecture is the first thing that pulls you in. Street-after-street of sophisticated and flamboyant structures that are designed to elicit a response out of you. It’s the kind of architecture that forms its own narrative, rouses your imagination and tells its own stories. But from there on, it becomes a bit of an open ended question. What is your poison? Sitting at a café on a sunny morning sipping a Melange at a café and watching genetic lottery winners walking by? Decking the halls of museums and looking at rare gem stones with names like ‘Cinnabarit’? Or perhaps your prefer walking the narrow passageways of Schönbrunn Palace, marveling at the wonder and grandeur of the Great Gallery and realizing that a Schnitzel is food that was fit for the most luxurious kings and queens? Or, or you could take a right turn at the front entrance of the Palace and visit a zoo instead? Yes, a zoo.
Tiergarten Schönbrunn, which translates to ‘Schönbrunn animal garden’ is a zoo located on the very grounds of the palace. It was founded as an imperial menagerie in 1752. What do the rich and powerful do when they have all the money and resource in the world? Well, they start a zoo of course. It was a tough sell for my wife to hit a zoo while in Vienna but I sold it by telling her it is considered one of the best in the world. My wife, being the kind of person that orders the items on a menu with a ‘chef’s recommendation’ icon next to them, bit. Zoos arouse a conundrum for me. The idea that these animals, designed and made to enjoy the large wild world, are put into an enclosed space, does bother me on some level. That saying, this zoo does its best in its efforts towards species preservation and ensuring that the animals’ stays are as comfortable as possible. The rhino enclosure was 2/3 the size of a football field and the polar bear’s sanctuary had enough land and water space for it to feel as free as possible. The polar bear was quite clearly the star of the zoo, with a special museum built under its enclosure that offers a lot of history information on the work that has been done with the polar bears by the zoo. People stood on the observation deck and waited for the star to appear but he was having none of it. That is until they lowered a basket of fish to lure it out. There is a certain perplexity with observing a polar bear in the flesh. It moves and behaves quite cuddly. Like a friendly uncle with a beer gut you could just walk up to and hug. But we all know that is not a good idea.
Zoos are funny things. It’s not one of those things you feel you want to do every month. In fact, the last time I stepped into one may have been more than 30-years ago. I am not sure why we feel this way. But yet, when I was there at Tiergarten Schönbrunn, I enjoyed myself immensely, scurrying from cage to cage to catch a glimpse of these wondrous beasts. It may be a while before I feel the need to go to a zoo again. There is an order of interest when it comes to choosing which section to visit first at a zoo. And in many ways, it is designed to appeal to the child in us. For me, they are plotted against a four box with the axis’ being ‘Size’ and ‘Danger’. I mean if you’re rushing into a zoo just to look at a racoon, then perhaps you should stay outside and have a Schnitzel instead. A lion on the other hand, would sit right at the top of that graph, and the one at this zoo certainly did not disappoint. Granted it sat at the top of structure and let out a few yawns but for a few seconds, it stared intently at our direction and my small toe curled for a second.
Our days in Vienna zipped by rather quickly, swallowed whole by the size and magnitude of the city. I remember remonstrating to the wife after the first day that we’ve hardly seen anything and a day was gone. But in hindsight I realise that this was in a way inevitable. Vienna is not one of those cities you can shuffle from sight-to-sight and feel like you’ve seen enough of it. It’s a city that requires time to appreciate, the kind of time that most vacationers won’t have. The people who truly enjoy the beauty and wonder of Vienna to its fullest are probably the people who make her every day. The office worker who takes the tram every weekday morning so he can get to his desk by 9 or the lady at the market selling fresh baked pastries, who rise before the sun to ensure people have something to eat when they feel like eating something. These are the people who enjoy Vienna the way Vienna should be enjoyed. And of them, I am of course envious but at the same time resigned with peace that at least I got to see a cheetah up close. How many people can say they have?